Disclaimer: My daughter is only 3 years old. I have no idea how she’ll turn out and if she’ll end up with a “complex” or not. These are just things I’ve seen from dealing with women of all ages and their struggles with their image over the past 10 years. Does this mean that if you do any of the things listed below, that your daughter will have issues? Not at all. But I’m here to tell you that what you learn and see (by example) as a young child DOES IMPACT how you view health as an adult! I’ve spent many hours REVERSING the habits and thoughts that have been deeply ingrained in women since a young age.
And yes, you as a mom have the biggest impact and influence on your daughter! What an awesome responsibility!
Ways To Give Your Daughter A Complex About Her Looks:
1.) Live in extremes.
Don’t eat carbs for 2 months, then binge on them the next. Exercise every day for 3 weeks, then stop completely for 2 weeks. Lose 50 pounds in 6 months. Gain it back in 3. Forget moderation on your favorite foods. Show her instability and lack of discipline at it’s best.
2.) Talk about how much you dislike your body.
Talk about the fat around your belly. The wrinkles around your eyes. The stretch marks on your thighs. Obsess over it and make sure she’s around to hear it.
3.) Demonstrate how beauty is only skin deep.
Never talk about how your heart, soul and spirit needs to be strengthened and refreshed. When upset about something in your life, turn to food or exercise first, rather than to God. Let her see you look in the mirror more than you look to God.
4.) Don’t take compliments from anyone, especially your husband.
Let her think that you aren’t worthy of a compliment because you aren’t “there yet”. Let her see that even though your husband may see you as the apple of his eye, you don’t feel that you are worthy to be that.
This doesn’t mean that your daughter (and sons!) shouldn’t see a mom who takes care of her body and is stewarding it well. It also doesn’t mean that a slip-up in word or deed will ruin her for life! I actually want to be a good example of that for her because I don’t want her to take after what the world claims is healthy! It’s a fine balance and there may be times that we are more out of whack than other times.
Mother’s Day, 2012
Understanding that we will never be perfect and trusting that God will fill in the gaps for us... are there areas that you could improve in by being this example for your precious daughter?
What things have you found instilled into your thinking as a young child that has carried over to your mentality about health and body image as an adult? How does your example in healthy living affect your sons? Please share below!